they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
just come out here and I will go home with you...
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize