He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize