Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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