I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
