I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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