If that was your dad, he is hot
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize