oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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