Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Are my feet made of real feet?
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
