One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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