Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
