I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
