either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
bring money and cleavage
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
