i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
