i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I think I am morally bankrupt
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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