He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
