Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Randomize