HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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