I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
