she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize