great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
