Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Let's get the cat blown out
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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