on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize