He is such a slut. More and more my type.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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