ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
