dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
