quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Randomize