She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize