Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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