Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
