I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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