Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize