Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
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