We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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