Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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