I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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