We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
the raccoons are back...
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