Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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