I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize