i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
