: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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