so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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