i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
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