Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Randomize
