OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Randomize
