I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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