i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
Randomize
