i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
You made out with two different species that night
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
But break dance skills will only take you so far
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize