Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.