cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Your cock deserves a montage
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
