So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Holy sore nipples Batman
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
